JJ left me for Montreal and I cried at the dentist because the sadness was too great to swallow. The dentist handed me one of those suction sticks intended for overwhelming drool. I sucked up my tears instead when her back was turned.
I cut my bangs two nights ago when I was very drunk and for the first time in eight months I feel like me agian.
Canvas, along with tawny colored spray paint was purchased on a hopeful whim. I smell an art attack.
I want to become a wedding photographer.
Bob Dylan and Billie Holiday have been the King and Queen of my musical court for the past week. I refuse to remove them from rotation until my sadness (from JJ's departure) subsides.
Africa is serving my arachnaphobic aunt and cousin well. Sara was swimming in marriage proposals and my heart swelled when I heard that a part of her heart fell off in Uganda. Uganda be kidding me. I love that jazz.
I love jazz, jazz.
For the first time in about three years, I am readily looking forward to Fall/Winter o8. Shit. Terrifying.
All I can think about is making, making, making, creating, creating, creating. Hands a blur. I have been working on some stencils and drawing like a manic maniac.
Climbing buildings with cute boys and spying on people in Chinatown apartments elbow to elbow with matching binoculars is the new black.
My bicycle still makes me melt.
Janessa took me to U of M for a taste of the Fine Arts program and we spent about four hours printing photos. I stood and felt giant objects with knobs and buttons and dials in the dark. I came out reeking of chemical and my eyes were confused for an hour due to the light tight blackness once I stepped back into the light of day. I loved that feeling, I want to feel that feeling everyday of my life for the rest of my life. I want to be a photographer and that will not change. I don't think.
Loco is out from Montreal and working alongside her and biking alongside her and smoking alongside her and eating alongside her are restoring things inside me that I thought were lost forever. She is leaving in ten days and I am glad there are no dentist appointments in sight. Waterworks.
The winter looks promising.
(I am happy) unapologetically content.
1 comment:
M.
You should be getting something in the mail today, it was guaranteed!
And, YES! You should write and photograph and draw and someday live close enough to me so we can interact sometimes. This is what you should do. One of the reasons I started taking photographs again was seeing yours. Really.
Love.
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